Friday, April 14, 2006

Bleh!

Warning, this liable to be a real downer. I'm in a MOOD and need to bitch a little, ok ALOT

Been feeling lazy all week. The weather has been better the last day or so but it really is unpredictable and with M in constant tow it's been alot harder to be spontaneous with the working out. Not fair to blame her entirely , hell at all for that matter. Funds are tight and we've been couped up in this house most of the week. As I've mentioned before, getting out of the house is typically an ordeal, though on Tuesday we did try to take Brandy for a walk but it was cut short due to rain.
Wed was suppose to be the day my granite counter top would be ready for p/u. T needed to put it off until Thurs, ok no problem (I was EXTREMLEY understanding), then on Thursday he can't find the invoice, he shows up at the place where we ordered it to learn that he has to go to another site to p/u ( would've been nice if they had mentioned that the day we bought it!!) The idiot sales woman assures him they'll have it, T gets there and surprise, they can't find our granite. They say he needs the invoice. At this point I'm thinking why didn't the sales woman have a copy or call ahead for us, something.....yes, I'm new at all this remodeling stuff and am growing more bitter by the minute!
T calls and well let's just say I'm less understanding and from that point on it's one angry phone call after another, scrambling to find the original invoice, finding it then faxing it to the second place. Come to find out the piece was never even cut, it's an outdoor workspace and they said it was due to rain and it won't be ready until Saturday.

FUCK!

I cannot tell you how aggravated I was yesterday. It was a beautiful sunny day, and I pissed it all away getting jacked up over the counter top.

This has been a strange week.
Not enough training or excercise
Not enough time ALONE
Not enough money
Not enough patience with the process
Not enough compassion
Not enough confidence
Not enough discipline to push through negative feelings

Wednesday was suppose to be spin class and a talk w/tri-club on transitions. M and I started out on good footing, but then she got all whiney and complaining despite my meager efforts to make things nice she just wasn't groovin and well I just lost it. Another day down the shitter!

Thursday, the only thing active I managed to pull off was going to swimming class, it was just okay.

I'm disappointed . I don't seem to have the ability to roll with the punches very well. I rely way too much on external forces to drive my emotions. I feel disconnected from everyone and everything.

Interestingly though, I spoke to my sister yesterday for the first time in several months. We've got our "challenges" let's just say, and I finally figured out less is more. We do better in small doses. I'm 6 years older than her and 11 years older than my brother. We all live in different states and couldn't be more different from each other, you do the math.

God I hope this storm passes soon. Going to Grandama Tillies for Easter, my cousin Kim will be there, she always makes me laugh and we have fun hiding the easter eggs.

Happy Easter everyone.
No, really.