Sunday, November 16, 2008

climate change and sustainability

sheesh,you hardly know how to dress these days. last weekend i was rummaging through boxes digging out sweaters and long sleeve shirts and yesterday i tore the closet apart searching out tank tops.
last week i was baking lasagnas and quick breads and this weekend the thought of even entering the kitchen is unsettling.....things better chill out soon or it's chips and cold-cuts come thanksgiving!

so, apparently i'm no longer a early bird runner..still a runner just not at the butt-crack of dawn kind of runner. i left the house this morning around 8:45 and ran mostly on the asphalt along Peralta and over to Colusa, both nice long stretches that wind through berkeley/albany residential areas. by the time i got to the big hill on colusa i stripped my shirt off and mostly ran to the top. i'm usually more modest but the heat factor dismissed that right away and i ran in my sports all the way home.

i'm not putting anywhere near the mileage,time or energy into training these days but i get in 1-2 runs a week, somewhere between 3-5 miles a pop and you know, it's all good. i logged onto recently looking for a race that might appeal to me and nothing really did.

i've been happily spending time at my new studio getting my sewing and craft materials organized. i'm really lucky to have such a sweet husband who finally agreed that the extra expense was worth it. i have a nice clean well lit space in emeryville, 5 mins. from home to work on various projects that can be left out for me to pick-up on at my leisure.

i've been lurking allot and a few favorite bloggers seem to be resurfacing here and there. i've not spent allot time blogging myself but i check in on many of you daily.

i really like the new job. i just had my 90 day review and i'm so happy i could go on an on but i'll spare you. suffice it to say the right job at the right time in my career has made a profound and positive difference in my well-being.

M and i were out last night and we ran into her pre-school teacher and her partner. Laila, was more than a pre-school teacher, more like a pre-school goddess. she has the most amazing way of saying so much in so few words. she along with her staff literally taught me everything i know about parenting. we've been casual contact over the years and running into her last night was timely.

M is a teenager now, and to be honest i tend to think of how much of a drag this fact is for me, the tortured mom of a drama queen. Laila put it so succinctly when she said "the only thing harder than being a parent of a teenager is being a teenager" i don't know why but it was like a loving smack upside the head rendered by a loving trusted alli that resonated deep down. for as hard and unmanageable as it seems at times, being what i need to be for M, Laila reminded me of how important perspective is and how tough this time is for M too. it's so easy to get caught up in the "all i do for you", "your so ungrateful...", or "when i was your age...." instead of focusing on how hard her behavior is on me it really makes sense to step back and remember how fucken hard it was at her age, how insecure and frustrated i was...(am still sometimes..)

so i find myself spending less time high on a ridge somewhere, less focused on training or the next race and more time in places like Sephora or Claires or Ikea. i still have to carve out me time, i do but with less intensity. i like the pace at which i'm moving right now. it feels sustainable.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008




Wednesday, August 20, 2008

peeing in public and epiphanies

had a nice run up at Lone Oak again...without Brandy this time. 3 miles in 36 minutes.

as soon as i hit the trail i had to pee. i don't have a problem with taking a leak in the brush when necessary but i am vain enough to CARE if i'm caught with my ass hanging out and because this low key loop is popular there's always a good chance of that.

there was a guy that i had to pass to find the shoot off trail to some privacy. i trotted down a little embankement, crossed a creek and hid amongst a few big ole redwoods but still could hear that guy on the nearby main trail...which made my bladder bashful and the longer it took the more certain i became of getting caught with my pants down! eventually i relieved myself and headed over towards the main trail.

i was father along than i realized and found myself climbing right away. there's always this point when i'm on a hill when i start bargaining and it realy works. i give myself permission to back off and one of two things happen: 1) i back off guilt free or 2) i just keep going. this loop is half the distance and steepness of Strawbery but is very challenging with longish climbs in certain sections. i hiked it this past sunday and running it today felt hard but not too hard like Strawberry and i should've started here to begin with several weeks ago but i let my pride get in the way .............and now that that's out in the open i'm going to publicly give myself permission to backoff on the 20K.


feeling "soft" and "bloaty" having uncomfortable periods (when i was more active i barely noticed them) and the fear of menopause (i'm 45 now) has me reconsidering my lazy ways. i needed to register for a race so it would register in my body that i needed to start moving again.

at the time a 20k seemed reasonable i had plenty of time to train i just didn't and then i tried to cram and while i didn't do any real damage to my knee it's strained. it never bothers me when i run and i just avoid leading with the right leg on the downhills but still there's some discomfort especially when i walk on pavement. it was a dumb move on my part to try and rush things along after virtually no trail running for 6 months!

what is it with me and actually training? the only time i really trained was for the sprint tri's in 06. everything with the exception of golden hills last october was relatively easy because i was able to rely on my base. now that's pretty much shot and i really am starting over....and i know this because even though i could run 6 to 10 miles right now it would hurt. just because i can doesn't mean i should.

mistakes are good it you learn from them. i started training late and then tried to cram fitness in. my pride has been hurt as much as my knee and i resolve to show fitness the respect it deserves. it took me a long time to build up to runs like Strawberry. i need to appreciate that more and build up slower.

i'm lucky to live pretty close to the parks and Redwood is beautiful. i dig the low key vibe of pctr. there smaller and it's not long before i'm left with my thoughts on the trail. i like the commaderie but i enjoy the me time i get on a trail run the most. races allow me to feel safe, supported and enable me to explore terrain i'd otherwise might not be so bold to.

anyhoo, we'll just have to see how it goes. i ran (road) monday before work and today (dirt) the plan is to repeat monday's run on friday before work and maybe a modified Strawberry run sunday,otherwise Lone Oak for sure.

it feels good to be moving again. a routine is slowly beginning to emerge. time will tell if i can be patient with myself. sliding behind the wheel of my car as i left Lone Oak this morning i licked the salty grin on my lips and thought "oh yeah this is why i run"

Sunday, August 17, 2008

running on sidewalks isn't the only reason for sore legs, truth is my right knee is still tender from my over enthusiastic return to trail running a couple of weeks ago, namely charging down Strawberry and favoring my right leg.

despite knowing better i've broken runnings cardinal rule. build up slow and steady. it's always always worked for me in the past so why i've succumbed to this on and off bullshit approach to getting ready for a 20k is beyond comprehension. i just need to base build and focus on having fun again.

i took brandy to lone oak this morning and about 5 minutes into our hike she got spooked by an older couple walking towards us. the goofball stopped dead in her tracks sniffed out a low growel and hightailed the opposite direction, almost all the way back to the car. so picture me with poop bags, leash, keys and water bottle chasing my dog...good times. when we were well out of view of the "scary couple" she slinked over to me and had to stay on-leash for the remainder of the way.

lots of fog in the canyon this morning, misty and fragrant i love this trail. brandy's ears perked a few times to the sound of owls hooting. we reached the summit in about 30 minutes and trotted down the other side in about 15. my knee liked the gentler descent and while not a real hard workout it cleared my head and was just the right amount of outdooor time to keep me in the loop so to speak.

in other news, this year T and I celebrated birthdays together and had one party and my SIL gave us gift certificate for Sur La Table, a fancy smancy kitchen store. with M at my mom's for a sleepover we had time to shop undistracted. we got a really cool indoor hydroponic herb garden, the AeroGarden, Pro 100. it's going to look great in this weird dark corner on my kitchen counter. can't wait to start reaping the spoils, which according to the reviews is freakishly fast. pictures forthcoming.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Taking Charge

after this mornings post i laced up and squeezed in a 3 miler before work. i just have to go bed earlier a kick a few bad haits that i've fallen back into. my last three runs have been on sidewalks and i'm feeling it in the worse way. i need to get on a dirt trail and into a swimming pool stat!

both WILL happen this weekend.
so the new job still feels very new and i very green but it's a good thing and i'm gradually learning my way around new equipment.

true to form as soon as i take on something new i tend to sacrifice running. with the race only a few weeks away i'm not sure what to expect. i registered for this race long before i knew i would be changing jobs and not that any of it is an excuse anyways i just strugggle with change and don't necessarily perform best under pressure. blah blah blah.

i just want to be a runner. whether it's a low key race or getting 3-4 regular runs a week i just want to be consistent and i am constantly letting myself get off track...eek track....speed work. bleh!

it's so easy to fall off the wagaon. getting back on not so much. i just know i'm not comfortable at all where my current level of fitness is headed. currently i'm at a size "concerned" it's a bit humiliating to be back at this place because while i never achieved a perfect body as i grew more fit running was less about losing weight and more a source of joy and personal achievement.

do i have the courage to pick myself up and dust myself off? weathering the storm(crazy schedule, last minute changes, laziness, ....) and not losing sight of the benefits of regular exercise has been ridiculously hard...why? why? why? i know it's good for me, i like myself better when i'm active. WTF!!!
i just need to make it happen.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

strawberry sunday

so i only got 3 out of 4 runs in this week, but i'm happy to report that 15 out of 18 miles were at strawberry canyon.

my tendency is to lead laterally with my right leg on the downhills and while i could get away with this when i was running more regularly my knee got to griping about it on thursday. some cross friction massage along with motrin seemed to help...and less running which was easiest thing to do given my hectic week on the work front.

i had a couple of interviews this week and am really excited to be finally breaking out of the skilled nursing setting and into the acute rehab arena. early in my career i worked in a an acute setting for about a year and a half but the facility went belly up for various reasons and over time i found more steady work in skilled nursing.

after 10 years i'm ready for a change and this new job is going to challenge me in new and exciting ways. i'm super excited and must confess a little intimidated too. but my "can do" attitude has gotten me this far so it's full steam ahead.

Monday, July 14, 2008

A plan of sorts

looking for some inspiration to run this morning i found myself at angies reading her zane gray report. i don't have any illusions about ultra running but there is something very contagious about their relationship with nature, body, mind and spirit.

i used my new shoes on pavement for a slow 3 miles around the neighborhood just to keep loose. i want to run no less than 4 days a week with my long runs on sunday and yoga on friday. this is
the beginning of my return to the world of trail running

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Fresh Start

i can't believe how long it took me to finally get my shit together and go for a trail run. it's been at least 5 months since i've run on a proper dirt trail!

i took Brandy with and we headed over to Strawberry Canyon. My garmin wasn't charged and i purposely left my watch at home. with only 9 weeks to go before my 20k i'm still very much in "base building" mode which needless to say isn't where i should be. but it is what it is. PCTR events are as hard as they fun and beautiful. i'll have good time regardless of how under trained i am on race day. still, today up at Strawberry my run assured me that while i'm not at the level of fitness i was this time last year i haven't gone totally to pot.

i shuffled up Big Bertha without much ado but i fatigued as i approached the second climb to the lookout bench and walked until it flattened out. Brandy was her usual curious self and leaped and bounded most of the way up, though her enthusiasm eventually gave way to her lack of fitness and she was lagging behind towards the end. more than once i had to double back and coax her along.

last weekend i went to REI to buy a new pair of Montrails and learned they no longer carry them. My Hurricanes still have some miles left on them, but hey since I'm basically starting trail running all over again I felt justified in getting some new shoes. I went to Transport on Solano. i asked the sales guy to measure my foot and it appears to have shrunk ....and no, it wasn't first thing in the morning when i shopped . it was noon and AFTER my Strawberry run when you'd expect feet to be their most swollen.

so i tell him i usually wear 9 and he says "really, looks here like your a 7.5 - 8" and i say "yeah, but i go up a size for running shoes" and so to appease me he brings out an 8.5 W because not only is my foot short it's now wide...which is news to me. i confess that i'm a pronator and he redirects me from some svelte looking Montrail i'm eyeballing to a more orthopedic looking Brooks which i dismiss immediately in favor the bulkier Montrail Hardrock. 8.5 and it feels good the store...but i've been happy with Montrails thus far so i got them along with a new camelback waist hydration pack.

it was good to hit the trails again, it's been way too long. it does require extra effort to gear up for a trail run and after such a long hiatus i feel like a roookie fumbling with basic logistics and gear issues as i try to get out the door.

what i know about trail running has basically come from just doing it and reading blogs or articles. i've been looking for a book specifically about training for trail races. i half suspect i already know what i need to know. i just wonder if there's a book out there that emphasizes the unique training aspects of trail running.

Saturday, July 05, 2008


this was actually taken at disneyland last month. the display we saw lastnight at the berkeley marina was pretty good too despite smoke and fog that occluded the grand finale. the three of us had a good time gorging ourselves on spinach and potatoe knishes, hot links,corn dogs, curly fries and corn-on-a-stick. totally justified as we parked Really Far Away. my choice of footwear could've been better but i had to wear my cheapo red sneekers to go with the blue and white i had going on and boy are my dogs tired. but i finally feel like i'm catching up on sleep.

as i watched T kicking back on our big blanket before the show he appeared to be the most relaxed i'd seen him in a long time. i think talking on the cell phone less and having fun closer to home has done us both some good this week.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

is the universe TRI-ing to tell me something?

while i was in anaheim last week i noticed several women at disneyland with race markings in their arms and legs. i struck up a conversation with a woman at the pirates of the carribean gift shop and she was participating in her first sprint triathlon put on by Danskin. it was cool chatting with her and i could feel the old excitement kicking in and a little emotion welling up inside me as i said very matter of factly "you are going to have a great day out there."

i ran all of twice while on vacation but i looked for my athelete on the course the next day. the ladies were greeted with perfect weather conditions. a cool cloudy morning without a hint of the heat and humidity that would dominate the rest of the week. as i ran along Harbor blvd. i gave shouts out and words of encouragement to the cyclists and as i got closer to the park i ran along with several runners cheering them on like they were all my best friends.

a few months ago i ran into my old triclub coach Hae Won and she mentioned that the club was going to reunite with alumnae and train for an oly in june. this morning i registered for my 20k at Redwood (Sept 6th). that should leave me plenty of time to get ready. i'm not commiting to the oly event but man did i get worked up and nostalgic when i saw the athletes last sunday. oh i'm so excited to have something to train for again. even M said to me , "yeah mom, i'm glad you signed up for something, you've been so stressed out"

today i receieved an email from Hae Won inviting me to join the upcoming training. when i think about how excited i got last week about the danskin event it's really got me entertaining the idea. i think i'd be over stretching though given how little training i've actually done these past few monthes and the oly is only 2 mos away. i told Hae Won when i saw her that i'd definitely be interested in doing a few workouts with them. between running into Hae Won, the Dankins event and her recent invite i'm starting to suspect the universe might be giving me a nudge to TRI.

Monday, June 23, 2008

My Journey

Hi...long time no nothing i know. school has been out for a month and i just got back from disneyland. the first thing i did when i got home was check my grades. i got an A in anthropology and a B in Basic Math. i'm pleased with my grades but not so happy about the stress and physical deconditioning that occured as i tried to wrap my brain around fractions and the edward sapir theory. i decided to drop my summer pre-algebra and just focus on a few areas i neglected during the spring. so, i've pulled out the quilting and i'm looking for a nice 20k trail race to train for maybe PCT's Redwood around the end of august, not sure. it's been months since i've stepped foot on a dirt trail.
i'm still not sure what i want to accomplish by going back to school. i do know that i turned out to be a fairly good student. school this time around is more interesting and i can learn math. i just don't know if i can be a good mom, wife and employee simultaneously. people do it all the time but i really don't need to compare myself to them do i? i learned that i like taking classes and so i plan just take ones that appeal to me and keep the stress to a minimum for now.

Friday, May 09, 2008

Home Stretch

Anthropology is over, we met for the last time last Saturday and i feel confident that i did well, i really enjoyed it though some days the amount of reading and writing competed heavily with time i needed for math. now i just have to do well on my math final....good vibes totally needed:)

i just got back from a decent run. i felt good and strong and it got me in the right space to get cracking with my studies. as sporadic as my running has been I'm still able to run 5 miles with relative ease...slow but enjoyable.

going back to school has been both great and extremely hard. i never really found the balance and i failed to keep up with exercise and healthy habits many times along the way but something positive did come from all those setbacks. I just stopped beating myself up over it. i found myself on several occasions giving myself pep talks and just moving forward. challenging myself academically certainly played on my confidence and math could be compared to ripping off a scab and exposing myself to all sorts of discomfort. but still, I'm stubborn as hell and will get through this even if it kills me...figuratively speaking of course.

Friday, March 28, 2008

It's Getting Better All The Time

it's been awhile since i've pulled off running clothes soaked from solid effort or felt that distinct burn in my quads and calves. i ran 3 times this week and i am especially proud of the 4 miler i ran AFTER work on wednesday, which by the way is NOT sucking at all. i mentioned previously that i've been running for time as i haven't strapped on the garmin since training last year but i have a few favorite short routes that keep me in the 4 to 5 mile range.

i have serious studying to accomplish. T and M are off for their annual spring trek to Gardernerville, NV this weekend so i'll have uninterrupted hours on end to study. Math is still playing hard to get but i'm hanging in there and slowly but surely the evil bitch is coming around.

so yeah it's been awhile since i've strung 3 runs together in a weeks time ...could Gu and Body Glide be in my near future? T brought the racing bikes inside and their hanging from hooks in the laundry room making it ever so much easier to get up and go for a ride but that usually involves more time than i have these days but maybe if i really bust ass on the studying i could ride on sunday,we'll see.

i am so loving the weather right now, happy spring ya'll!

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Back to square one

seems like i've been in restart mode for awhile now. school work and running on regular basis are a constant challenge. i run for time these days and the last time i ran was about 10 days ago. todays 40 minute run felt pretty good though i got a later start than i would've preferred.

our census in concord had been low and i was asked if i could help out in one of our marin facilities. after 3 days i asked to be considered for a full time position and once i had a talk with my concord manager the wheels were set in motion and i'll be working in san rafael full time after next week. woohoo!

the commute from berkeley is cake and i figure what i shell out in toll is more than made up for in what i save on gas. it's a smaller building and it's lacking in many of the basics but i really like the nursing staff and anyone who works in rehab can appreciate that.

we layed down the kitchen and laudry room flooring two weeks ago and the house still hasn't recovered. we reorganized quite few pieces of cabinetry and moved some other pieces of furniture around. the old couch was taken away and the new one is finished but waiting to be delivered from somewhere in virginia. T thought it would be a good idea to drag out a spare twin mattress in the meantime, personally i think it just exacerbates an already chaotic living space.

it's true what they say about it getting worse before it gets better.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

i've been tagged

consideing what a blabber mouth i can be it's funny even to me that i can scarcely think of 7 things to share about myself
but i'll give it a go...

i'm often perceieved as as pushy and demanding.

ironically, people tell me all the time that i'm too sensitive and that i take things too personally.

i attended 2 grammar schools, 2 middle schools, 3 high schools,
1 allied health professional school, and 5 jr. colleges.

i served a mission in italy during my mormon phase..relatively short phased but enough to completely wreck my twentys.

i love my husband more today than when we were first married.

when i feel nervous or insecure i go for a run or do something active to regain my confidence and works every single time without fail.

i'm funnier in person than i am on my blog.

so there ya go, lame but true. now i need to wade through about a bazillion pages in my anthropology book.

Monday, March 03, 2008

Good Night Moon

Over the weekend M and I hauled out our bikes and rode for a good hour . i rode to class on Saturday, avoiding hills whenever i could. i got a couple of lights and reflectors today to ride at night but i have to admit preferring to drive while it's still chilly at night. maybe in the summer when it's lighter and warmer.

I supported girl scout cookies sales last week and brought home..hmm...8 boxes on Thursday....
I'm glad i took just 2 classes, it's a manageable load and i'm doing well in both classes so far. i could stagger my math study sessions better, but all in all it's going well.

I think i just need to face a few facts and not keep hoping for things to settle into any consistent routine. i have a few fixed items on my plate but so much else is random and feels out of my control.

i wanted to swim on Sunday, i felt too tired to run or ride after Saturday's little ride to class that had me huffing and, i wanted to swim because i needed some thing restorative and when i found everything BUT my swim cap..that's when i decided to go for a bike ride with M...much to her dismay.

Let me just say this about life with a girly girl. yeah it's fun and i love me some pink.but i wish she was a tiny bit more like i was when i was her age...i liked girly stuff and bikes.....Plus, i wish she'd just get with the program already and not find it necessary every single time to protest and whine.

Needless to say it wasn't a really enjoyable ride but we managed to put in a whole hour. after we pumped up her tires we headed over to the bicycle bridge and rode around the fake lake there along highway 80. we rode around the "lake" once and then backtracked home. we rewarded ourselves with? that's right MORE GIRLSCOUT COOKIES. ok so not good in the nutrition dept. but i'll take a few points for the ride and for not losing my shit when she made it so easy to.

ok. im so going to regret staying up so late. but i'ts hard to go to sleep after my night class.

goodnight moon

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Live and Learn

this guy pretty much summed up how i felt following a field trip to the zoo with my anthropology class a couple of weeks ago. we had to observe a number of animals and try to identify signs of culture and communal behaviors. i didn't manage my time well and pretty much had a meltdown by the end of the day.

Saturday, February 02, 2008

It's all work

i have been crazy busy with work, a couple of the surrounding nursing homes have been shut down due to influenza and our caseload has literally tripled in the last week. it's not called work for nothing.

while i wont go so far as to say i'm worried i am starting to get concerned about when the hell i'm going to settle into some kind of routine. school, work and working out it's still not coming together. i rely on T for most of M's shuttling to and fro and with him out of town on business i've been picking up the slack. on wednesday i worked half day and walked the dog for 50 minutes.

i will say to his credit he pushed hard on thursday to make it back from Monterey on time to get her to her dance class in oakland by 4 pm. not having a regular schedule has forced this catch as catch can approach....and it's really not cutting it. you can only wing it for so long.

on the upside. we're eating allot less red meat, mostly chicken and some fish. 2-3 servings of veggies and fruit. water intake pretty much sucks , though i have been enjoying brown rice tea allot. i'm really trying to at least eat better if i'm not exercising as much. only ran once this week but i'm not going to get all wrung out about it. it is what it is.

m and i are attending a nutrition class together next week at kaiser. i've been getting a tad bit too casual about workplace eating, seems like the valentines day candy showed up early and i've been popping a chocolate or two or three in my mouth on a daily basis.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

i really shouldn't be here right now

but because any self respecting procrastinator knows that before you can really dig into the meat of the matter, in my case doing housework AND homework, there's trimming and prepping that must occur first.

looking at the mountain of stuff that has occupied my dining room table for oh uhm, ever.....i'm now thinking that the kitchen island will be my study area. it's the one room that i seem to keep tidy and it's far away enough from the living room that i can concentrate and co-exist with M's marathon viewing's of "Jon and Kate makes 8." lately she's been pulling the "why am i an only child?" card, to which i calmly reply,
"because knowing ones limits is a good thing and kid your it!"

i recently finished reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by elizabeth gilbert...which i thoroughly enjoyed..turns out it was a nice segue for the topic of discussion in yesterday's anthropology class. gilberts travels take her Indonesia, a country i knew literally nothing about before reading her story. in class, we watched and discussed a film on Papua New Guinea. gilbert described the cerominies and customs she observed and much of it was similar to what i saw in yesterdays class. i think it's kinda cool when that happens, seemingly unrelated acts that turn out to compliment eachother. making connections is awesome.

still, as fascinating as it all was in class yesterday. it's a class, and i'm a little more than intimidated at the prospect of writing college essays. i'm not uptight really or even anxious but i'm definitely not in my comfort zone....and that's usually a good sign. it means i'm about to learn something new. learning to swim comes to mind.

if pain is weakness leaving the body than i can reasonably assume that the discomfort i'm feeling now is new knowledge trying to enter my brain, right? i'll keep this in mind during monday night math class.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Stressing Less

nothing like a little sun and some caffeine to turn your running around. i'm enjoying my coffee ritual once again and i was sooooo happy to see patches of sun on this mornings little 4 miler. oh happy day!!

my dear sweet mia's recent post got me to thinking how we (myself very much included)invite unnecessary drama into our fitness efforts by self imposed pressure to perform, inspire or just plain put a dent into "the goals".

i was telling her how i stopped writing in the blog as i face my own struggles with getting back into some sort of routine and i had to ask myself why? i like coming here and writing about my life not just my running life. i like the challenge of putting into words my take on it all. i write more in a private journal but i also like making connections with other bloggers and well i just don't think you have to be a hard core athlete in training to be here.

i'm really happy with today's efforts, everything felt good and the good bit of stretching afterwards felt great. PLUS the 30 minute walk with Brandy afterwards burned another 161 calories.

no pressure just easy forward motion.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

where is the sun?

i ran outside today and i'm sad to report that it wasn't as enjoyable as the run on the treadmill..gasp...can't quite believe it myself really. it's just this junk lingering in my chest made sucking in the cold air quite unpleasant.

while the rain has let up it's still cold and gray, (normally two conditions i prefer during a run) i miss the sun!! oh well, at least i got out there and worked up a sweat. getting back on track is not without it's aches and pains, the slight soreness in my quads from wednesday's run is a gentle reminder that i will not be picking up where i left of any time soon.

it's not uncommon when your ill to revert back to things that are familiar. you see it allot in the elderly, often times they'll revert back to their native language when there defenses are down and they are on the the mend. i find something similar happening to me. when i first started running. i did the popular walk-run program. i didn't have any of the gadgets or gear i have now. i never took the dog. things were fairly simply: walk a minute run a few more. i did this for several weeks until i was running longer and walking less. pretty much since the race last october i've returned to less structured runs. and since getting sick with the FLU FROM HELL and trying to get back on track, i find that the less "stuff" involved the more likely i'll actually run.

plodding along the BART trail this morning i left the gadgets and the dog behind because i didn't want to know how slow i was going and i really don't have the energy (or patience!) to include Brandy on runs around the neighborhood right now, i'm tired and cranky and just don't want to deal with all her distractions during the run so i just walk her afterwards.

getting out there and doing something is major accomplishment
right now.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

1st workout of 2008!

procrastination is a funny thing. i tend over think the simplest things which inevitably causes more delays so instead of trying to figure out the best way to get back on track with running i snuck up on it by putting yoga on the front burner.

it's normally a 90 minute class. i parked several blocks away in a 2 hour space for free then walked to the gym ARMED WITH MY OWN YOGA MAT, AS I'VE BECOME A GERM PHOBIC. i did restorative yoga for 45 minutes then hit the treadmill for 30 minutes. it felt so good to be running again, even at a 13 minute pace. with SNOW PATROL blasting in my ipod it was the best goddamn treadmill run i've had in a long time. woohoo!

so tonight i met with my school counselor and i'll be taking bone head math and anthropology 3. it's only 6 of the recommended 12 units they suggest in order to obtain your AA in 5 semesters, but i know me and math and it's going to require extra effort so justifiably i will NOT be adding sociology, history and english to the mix. once the math courses are behind me i can carry a heavier load. my math class is 7-10 pm on mondays (ugh) and the anthropology class is 8-5 pm on saturdays, luckily we only have 6 clasess.

i was watching a very interesting program on public television about the brain and it's plasticity. it was encouraging to hear that you can teach an old dog new tricks.

Monday, January 07, 2008


i finally got back to work today however i have yet to get back to working out. i am seriously deconditioned!

not even near perfect running conditions, chilliscious air with the sun peeking through big puffy white clouds is doing much to coax me outside today.

i miss drinking coffee and i think it may have something do with the demise of my exercise mojo...that and the fact that i've turned into a lazy cow.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008


i'm SICK of being sick!

i went for a short walk around the neighborhood, brandy and M really needed to get out in the worse way too. changing the sheets is enough to cause me to break a sweat. i'm generally a very healthy person. i get run down for a day or two and then it's over but i'm beginning to feel like this flu from hell is never going to end. i make a very bad patient. i'm starting to pick at solid food now but everything tastes like ass.

i informed work i'd not be returning until next monday. another colleague is out as well and while i feel bad that my boss can't take a couple of days off as she planned i'm in no shape to work with sick people. the queen's got to step up when the worker bee's are falling to the way side.

it's not like i can hide in some cubicle behind a desk, it's hard to keep a safe distance when your hauling sick patients out of bed, getting them to perform their own self care. half the case load from a week ago was admitted the acute hospital.

i'd like to get out for another walk tomorrow before the weather kicks in, preferably somewhere forested. the fumes from the neighboring refinery were so bad today which was why the walk earlier was so brief. my car was in concord getting it's windshield replaced, but it's back now so i'll try to get to Tilden tomorrow before it rains. i actually have grown to like hiking and running in the rain but it doesn't seem like the wise thing to do just now.