bad moods can wreak havoc on training.
an emotionally draining phone call from a distraught relative.
hustling a less-than-cooperative child out the door.
other things like foul weather, or plain old laziness can pose a barrier too.
i can usually work through the weather and the laziness...but the mental hurdles are the real training threats.
i find it most difficult to get out the door when i'm in a bad mood. my whole attitude is completely in the crapper and i am too irritated to focus on running.
most people don't get this, for me the anger is physically draining and i shut down and i usually
a) want to hash out the problem or
b) be left the fuck alone.
completely contradictory, i know.
that said, it would be reasonable to assume that i'd want to go for run, blow some steam off, right? not! i'm not really sure why, but the minute i've "lost it" all of my concentration and focus is tuned inward. i feel trapped in myself and negative thoughts lead to inactivity.
the anger management classess were helpful in reminding me that the anger comes in waves and if one can be STILL long enough to ride it out , eventually it passess.
being still in the mind is fine but perhaps i need to reconsider it on the physical level...
it's as though some degree of harmony with my surroundings, my relationships, my world is required for me to FEEL ready and able to care for myself.....which is really not that out there....when you think about it.
despite the current stormy weather i'm lacing up and heading out soon....but this mental hurdle of mine has cropped up too many times ....not just with running....with just about any good pursuit. it has me thinking what has my anger cost me?
running in bad weather is damn near easy compared to taking on a black mood....riding out the storm is all i can do. i keep thinking if i do so long enough i'll be able to break through the real barriers.