Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Because I'm the Mom

Dear M,

i will alway's feel guilty for the lack of sit down meals in our home

i will alway's have a pain in my heart for all my shortcomings and my lack patience

i will alway's want to beat the crap out of those snotty little bitches at school.

i will alway's want to protect you from the mean girls.

i will alway's worry about you, holding my breath that we'll get through this current "phase"

is there anything harder than being a parent? it's like holding a giant magnifying glass up to one's own flaws and imperfections.

i wish i felt more joy and less angst about parenting you right now. i wish i was the solid rock you need. i want so much to have the right advice, enough patience, the ability to stay neutral when every fiber of my being wants to scream. it's been a rough year and middle school hasn't exactly been a smooth transition.

i really need to get through this weekend and focus more on my parenting skills.


Anne said...

I've always said the hardest part of parenting is having to go through childhood again. You can't fight their battles in school, but you can make sure home is a safe and welcomed refuge from the rest of the world. And that doesn't mean three square meals around a table each day; it's just being there and letting them know someone still cares.

Mia Goddess said...